๐ฏOne of my projects took me to Yobe, some years ago. I'd been told that it was a highly volatile area (at that time). But I regarded it simply as an info.
โNot only was there no direct flight (I had to fly to Maiduguri, then travel by road to Yobe), there was a particular road that (unbeknownst to me) we had to pass before 4pm, after which it was blocked till the next day (Boko Haram still terrorised this area that year).
โปOn this particular day, my flight was delayed, so basically we got to the road just when they blocked it. I had a training in Yobe the following morning, so going back was not an option. Even if I wanted to, the whole stretch of road was blocked - both ways!
๐ฅYou guessed right! I had to sleep on the road, inside the the car - just me and the driver that had been sent to pick me! Later in the night, we could hear the terrorists' gunshots in the nearby forest! Let's even leave out the fact that I didn't blink an eyelid that night - mosquito wanted to finish me!
๐คBut my point is:
If I had been told earlier, that I would sleep on the road that night, in that situation and terrifying condition, I would probably not have embarked on that project at all!
But I found myself in that situation, and I survived it! My brain readjusted, changed and adopted to the new experience I was going through. This helped me live through the horror.
โBut...
- If the brain can re-organise itself, why then do we panic sometimes and/overreact in certain situations?
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Uzoma
Years ago at my workplace, I was inadvertently making silent enemies because I was brazenly outspoken and would "...say things the way they were."
I was being "brutally honest" and forgetting that the brutality part was real for some people!๐คฆ๐ปโ
I didn't mean any harm; didn't mean to hurt anybody, but that's exactly what I was doing. And while I was excelling at my job role, I wasn't many people's favourite person to talk to๐๐ปโ
Then I reflected and realised what was going on - and that sent me to a journey of series (years) of self development courses.
Today, I still pass on negative messages, still honest about my opinion and still have those difficult conversations with people, but I'm doing them differently. The result is that people TRUST me more; they trust that I'll give the necessary feedback in the most objective, beneficial and win-win way.
๐๐ผHow about you?
What's your tact and diplomacy story or experience?
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Uzoma Uduma
A ๐๐๐ซ๐๐ฃ๐๐จ & ๐๐ฃ๐ซ๐๐จ๐ฉ๐ข๐๐ฃ๐ฉ company's Rep successfully convinced me to register with them. I chose a plan and asked for a brochure with more details. Instead, she sent a different one,
claiming that it was exactly the same as the one I wanted, and that they both operated the same way. I insisted on being sent the one that got me sold, or I'd back down.
Finally, she sent me the right brochure, explaining that what she sent earlier was mostly preferred by people. Then she pointed out that the brochure I wanted was in her other phone which she'd lost recently, and that she had to ask her colleagues to send it to her (so she could forward to me).
๐คท๐ปโ๐๐ฉ๐บ ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฅ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ซ๐ถ๐ด๐ต ๐ด๐ข๐บ ๐ข๐ญ๐ญ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต, ๐ช๐ฏ๐ด๐ต๐ฆ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ต๐ณ๐บ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ด๐ฆ๐ญ๐ญ ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฅ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต?
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Uzoma Uduma
Is it 'required,' or 'optional' to say "๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ช๐ ๐ฆ" upon receiving payment for a service you have rendered?
More specifically, is it right for a client to demand that you thank them, after they pay you?
This was my experience two weeks ago with a client that I was ghostwriting for.
When he made the first instalmental payment for the book I was writing for him (and sent evidence of payment via WhatsApp Text, which was the medium through which we were communicating at the time) I acknowledged receipt of the payment.
Me: This payment is received โ
Him: Excuse me, please. I expect you to say thank you for the payment, even if you worked for it.
I thought he was rude; the tone of his message didn't come across to me as respectful.
Therefore, typical of me, I addressed it immediately, expressing exactly how I felt.
By the time he was done explaining himself, it was obvious that if he had coined his message differently, or chose his words purposefully, there wouldn't have been any misunderstanding.
๐คHow would you have reacted if you were in my position?